I’m going to write this although I know fully whell that, literally as I push the publish button, I’ll instantly remember 10 better scenes that I should have been shoe horned into the list instead. I love a decent unbroken long shot as it totally immerses you in the film and makes you feel you’re a voyeur in real events and not someone watching an eloquently arranged series of images designed to make you feel emotion x. You find your eye drifting around the scene and picking out things of interest – not just what the editor wants you to see. They’re difficult to organise, hard to execute and rarely used for good reason.
I also love watching a scene and knowing that dozens, if not hundreds of people on set have to hit their mark for them to be pulled off.
1. OLDBOY (2003)
I’d prefer to watch a god, well choreographed fight like this than watch Neo fight 100 digi doubles any day of the week
Having posted the previous post I’ve had a few ephihanies about other amazing last shots and I’m so disgusted at myself for not including them originally that, after some ritual self flailing, I’m adding an additional 10 now. With minimum blurb as I’m like, y’know, busy and ting. Really wanted to add the end of The Naked Gun, which if I recall is just the actors pretending to hold a freeze frame while the credits roll, but I can’t find it on line. Comedy gold
1. PLANET OF THE APES (1968)
I mean, it’s just the daddy of twist endings isn’t it?
I love nothing more than a great final shot. Here are some of my favourites in no particular order:
1) MONSTERS INC (2001)
So simple and beautiful. Sulley goes through the broken door to see if it still goes to Boo’s bedroom.
A beat. A voice off camera speaks:
Sulley smiles. The end. That’s all you need. I have something in my eye
I had another guilty moment on Monday morning, one of our FX supervisors Eugenie, had spent her weekend visiting the Warner Brothers Harry Potter tour just North of Watford – trooping around the Hogwarts film set learning about the world of modern film making. Of course she didn’t need to learn about the ins and outs of the film industry as she’s got four of the Harry Potter films on her CV – in fact there are probably many celebrated shots in the Harry Potter canon which are the direct result of her influence and skill. The reason for visiting, as for many of my colleagues, was to see Ollivander’s wand shop at the end of the tour. Here, as a sign of appreciation to the faceless masses who toil on modern feature films 4,000 individuals have had their names assigned to wand boxes that can be perused by Potter fans and aficionados in the stock room.
I’m a very lucky bunny. Not only do I look like a young Kenneth Brannagh but I also have a great job.
Until last May I worked in one of most infuriating jobs created by the fair hand of man – if I’d stayed in that role I’d now be doing intelligence products on the Olympic park for some government quango and drinking straight meths from a brown paper bag in the work disabled toilet (I miss that place). I used to be an intelligence analyst – it’s a flashy title – I essentially sat in a room for 7 hours a day surrounded by officious bureaucrats and unmotivated temps filtering my way through intelligence alerts – tutting at spelling mistakes and researching criminals through the power of facebook. It was crime fighting by moving grains of sand.
My Mum is a legend
Sunday was Fathers day. I don’t really have a Father, at least one I’m familiar with. I went to my fathers book signing in January and he didn’t recognise me which isn’t surprising given I haven’t seen him in 14 years. The weirdest thing about it all was I felt nothing – due to the fact that living in a 2.4 family unit was so long ago it was literally another life time.
The person who raised me, looked after me, and was always there for me was always my mum Geri. Who is one of the bravest, kindest and nicest people a soul could wish to meet.
So I suppose Fathers day for me was Mothers day too. As she has always filled both roles and made sure I wanted for nothing.
I recently met up with a few friends in a London pub to discuss respective careers and got reminded of a particularly low point in my life that I’d like to share with you. Mainly because it’s now so far in the past that it’s actually fairly amusing. It’s time to take ownership and laugh.
Basically about five years ago I was working at a company that I really wanted to make a good impression at, I was given a temporary contract with the company lasting no more than one month and I wanted to stay. So I did all the things one should; worked hard, stayed late, attempted to network with influential people in my own overenthusiastic and cack handed way.
So on Wednesday night I returned to one of my new local haunts, Dr Sketchy (London) to draw naked models in ridiculous scenarios. Once again I failed to win a prize (just – damn you! Damn you to hell!) but managed to win a runners-up cupcake. Which is sort of a prize but you can’t show it to people as you eat it instantly. Or at least I do.
Anyway here are my two entries which I was kinda proud of in an infantile way:-
1) Task was to draw model ‘Militaryman Luke’ leading his gay troops into battle in 5 minutes. This was my homage to Dr Strangelove.
2) Another task was to draw the female model Annette Bettie, ‘entertaining’ the troops. The compere had at this point loudly dubbed me ‘cock boy’ for my phallic doodles so I decided to do something more pedestrian and innocent. But then the 1 minute clock was announced and I defaced my harmless effort with puppet sex and a vibrator. I was trying to resist but the voices were insistent.
They always are.
"Entertaining the troops."
All in all considering I drew them in felt tip I’m awful proud. However the highlight of the night was when the compere held up the above drawing and showed it to the pub, “look what cock boy drew!” he exclaimed.
“Are you single cock boy?” he asked.
“Surprisingly not.” I replied.
“SHAME!” shouted an attractive woman to my left. Which made me blush.
A yearly ego boast for me and a cupcake! Felt like Christmas.
I love my Mum, she’s classic, an urban legend, my hero and beloved surrogate mother to numerous waifs and strays. And for good reason.
Anyway in celebration of my dear old Mum, who has put up with me for 31 years, (she’s not dead or anything) here are my favourite 10 anecdotes – told with total affection.
1) Once when I was home from Uni Mum had to drop me at Hatfield station so I could get the train back to Lancaster, half way to the station she said it’d just be easier if she drove me the extra twenty miles to Watford Station so I didn’t have to change trains. Then, half way to Watford, she said she’d ‘just drop me back to Lancaster’ which is a 600 mile round trip. Still she did it on a whim to spend more time with me. That’s love isn’t it?
Behold my comedy magic
When you see a global email ping into your iinbox at work you expect the usual; sweets in the kitchen, someone leaving for pastures new who will miss you all terribly, an email about an uncoming football game. But what I got the other month was something a lil different. An offer to see a Muse concert none-the-less. At Wembley stadium.
Now when I get a carrot like that dangled in front of your face I rarely say no. Cos I’m a cheapskate. Even if, and please don’t judge me, you don’t really like Muse. I don’t dislike them either per se it’s just I’m rather indifferent to them. Like cuccumber in sandwiches or Norwegiens.
The only catch to the whole setup was that I dress up like a protestor, grab a placard and make a wally of myself in front of the entire audience. And when I say ‘catch’ I mean added ‘incentive.’ As I’m rather attached to my inner imbecile and like making a tit of myself in a consequence free environment.